Santa's Mules

Santa called up the other day
While I was outside shoin'
My wife's favorite saddle horse.
He said, Dan, how ya doin'?

I hear you own a set of mules;
You pack 'em summer an' fall.
But I'd like to borrow 'em, he said.
That's the reason for my call.

I had the vet out the other day -
She said my reindeer were sick.
No Christmas trip, she ordered me,
So you can see I'm in quite a fix!

I'd like to borrow your four best mules
This year for my Christmas ride.
Four mules can do the work of nine deer,
Just as long as they can fly.

Well, I don't know 'bout the flyin' part,
I told St. Nick on the phone.
But if it'll help pull off Christmas this year,
Well, I'd be glad to make the loan.

Just leave the flyin' lessons to me, he laughed.
By New Years you'll have 'em back.
But I might need your help tyin' hitches
An' loadin' up their packs.

So I'm headed north later this week -
Spendin' Christmas at the Pole.
How Santa teaches mules to fly,
I'd surely like to know.

And while mules can be pretty stubborn,
Santa'll like 'em just fine, I bet.
They're smarter than any ol' reindeer,
And even some folks I've met!

So next year I figure that Santa
Will own his own string of mules.
His reindeer'll be sent out to pasture -
No more workin' the night before Yule.

And no more talk about Rudolph -
Just give Santa a string of long ears.
Now we wish you a merry Christmas -
And the happiest of all New Years!